Blog

Dealing with Porn Addiction

Lessons from Ed Latimore

If the following apply to you, you may be addicted to porn

  1. You’re spending money on porn
  2. You’re depressed
  3. Your d*ck doesn’t work
  4. Your porn taste has escalated
  5. You have brain fog and low energy
  6. You’re choosing porn instead of girls in real life
  7. You can’t stop watching porn despite the consequences
Tactic: DICK DETOX (only touch your dick for cleaning and urinating)

7 Easy Ways to Finally Quit Porn

  1. 1. Delete your browser history
  2. 2. Install an adult site blocker
  3. 3. Don’t touch your dick
  4. 4. Get physical & get away from the computer
  5. 5. Talk to some women
  6. 6. Meditation and mindfulness
  7. 7. Build or join a support group

Other Ideas

Keep a diary to identify what triggers you to look at porn. Try keeping a diary of times when you felt tempted to access porn and any times that you followed through with the urges as well. Record how you were feeling, where you were, what time of day it was, and any other factors that you think may have contributed to your urge to access porn. Make a note of the feelings of shame and guilt that you felt afterwards. Review your diary after 2 weeks to look for patterns.

Say a prayer whenever you feel the urge… become completely present and experience the craving without submitting to it!

Manage the triggers! Find a healthy response to them!

Completely remove the concept of porn as even being an option! Be okay with never viewing it again and completely remove it as an option.

When you characterize porn as an addiction it tells you that it is hard to break free, that it is a struggle, that relapse is inevitable — all things that have nothing to do with porn. But when you characterize online porn as junk food, the solution is obvious: don’t eat it.

The Last Psychiatrist

Tips from Art of Manliness 

One of the most powerful things that can help you quit using porn is simply understanding how it affects your brain and why it’s so alluring. (Parts 2 & 3 of this series go a long way in imparting this understanding.) Instead of seeming like some mysterious, menacing, unstoppable force, your attraction to porn is revealed as a perfectly natural drive that’s been hijacked by a supernormal reproductive and evolutionary reinforcer.

More at Art of Manliness

Porn is sexual junk food

Instead of trying to “beat” the “addiction,” a more helpful goal is to simply become the kind of guy who doesn’t look at porn. I know. Easier said than done. But think about it this way: if you see yourself as a guy who has to try really, really hard not to look at porn, instead of as a guy who just doesn’t look at porn because he’s got other interests, you’re in for a real slog through life.

The way you get to be the “guy who doesn’t look at porn” is to start acting like a guy who doesn’t look at porn. Act as if; fake it until you make it. I’m not saying this approach will make things easy, particularly in the beginning of trying to quit, but it can help make quitting porn feel like less of a battle and more of an effort to change for the better.

So if you experience a lot of guilt and shame after a setback, you may be making the porn habit worse.

Just accept the fact that you may have setbacks. Maybe you won’t, but most men who are trying to quit do. When those setbacks happen, don’t beat yourself up or wallow in self-pity. Just recognize the setback and then get back at it again. You may even consider “parenting” yourself like a video game by setting up some sort of swift, dispassionate “punishment” for your slip-ups, like donating a few bucks to a charity you dislike, or to the political party opposite of yours. The key is to be consistent and dispassionate with your negative feedback.

YouTube player
1. Identify your triggers (what are you thinking? How do you feel?. 2. Seek a replacement activity – reprogram your mind 3. Make porn as inaccessible as possible 4. Brainwash your mind into realizing how bad porn is for you (desensitizes you to sex, causes ED)

From: https://everaccountable.com/blog/understanding-triggers-in-pornography-recovery/

Dr. Weiss’ Six Stages of the Sexual Addiction Cycle:

  1. Triggers (Shame/Blame/Guilt)
  2. Fantasy (Control)
  3. Ritualization (The Bubble)
  4. Acting Out (Release)
  5. Numbing
  6. Despair (Shame)

“Many users look at pornography as an emotional coping strategy rather than merely seeking pleasure. Dr. Rob Weiss, a leading researcher of pornography’s effects says that “these individuals use [pornography] not to feel pleasure but to escape emotional discomfort.” It is a desire for emotional escape rather than a desire to “get high” that is the crux of all addictions and compulsive behavior.”

The key to stopping the cycle before it starts is recognizing what triggers you and seeking help immediately.

immediately seek help once you feel the urge to look at pornography. Call your mom, your friend, go talk to your wife, your kids, just leave your phone and computer behind and immerse yourself in someone else’s company. You could also drop your phone on the kitchen counter or your desk and then take a brisk walk or better yet, hit the pavement with your running shoes, or go to the gym and treat yourself to a hard workout. Like putting out a fire that has engulfed you, stop, drop, and roll could be applied to triggers: STOP in your tracks, DROP your phone or laptop screen, and ROLL on out of there and into some other activity immediately. Put out the fire before it has a chance to start!

Helpful Links

https://www.artofmanliness.com/character/behavior/how-to-quit-porn/

More Stories